Alpha is away at the moment and as such I had a terrible nights sleep. Again.
Usually I love the first evening he has gone. I'll eat something that Alpha hates (I can't even tell you, it's so fattening and revolting. I certainly can't tell the Frenchman or Alpha. Bagel with mayo, marmite, cheese, lettuce and cucumber anyone? Baked potato with Philadelphia, baked beans and cheese? Ugh, it makes me sick to write them. These are sad leftovers from my boarding school incarceration) and then I'll hop into the bath with a book and a good single malt (ruining it slightly by adding coke but we all have our cross to bare) and then stay there for hours, topping up the bath with hot at least twice. Then I'll stay up late, finishing said book, and drop into an exhausted and restless sleep.
Then next night will be worse because I'll be bored, tired and still unable to sleep.
Alpha has been away for almost a week now and I'm beyond exhausted. My skin is terrible, my hair is thin and frizzy, my weight is up and I feel revolting. I'm also... quietly now... rather in need of a wax but don't intend to do anything about that until he's back. That or I'll do something about it when it looks like I might get lucky which, as we know, I don't need Alpha for.
The reason I don't sleep well without Alpha's reassuring warmth beside me is because I wake up constantly and dream the most bizarre and vivid dreams. Some have been so fantastical I have had to get up and write them down as, all too often, the dreams disappear like Klatchian* mist by morning.
Last night I had a dream that definitely was not washed away with my morning shower. It's been rattling around my head as clear as a picture ever since and I simply can't stop thinking about it.
There is a man in Beijing, a good friend of mine and a good friend of Alpha's, and all of the girls have a bit of a crush on him... we'll call him the Teacher on account of this one revolting jacket he owns that always puts me in mind of my senior school chemistry teacher. That aside he's tall, good looking, funny and bright as a button. Always the perfect gentleman. He has an on again and off again girlfriend - a vaguely attractive Euro with more beauty than charm and more charm than wit. No one is quite sure what he's doing with her though I suspect she's a dynamo in the sack.
So on to my dream. In it, we, the Teacher, myself and a few friends had just finished dinner and drinks and were now standing around trying to decide what we would do next. The Teacher and I shared a look and we were on. In the dream I remember thinking I had no idea where it had come from, this flash of lust, as we had never in real life hinted of anything further. Whatever my Kept Woman life may be, in public, I am the perfect, dutiful wifelet.
Back in the dream we both made our excuses to the group and, once they had gone, moved closer together. Our bodies touched and I felt that dull heat throb between us. His mouth was inches from mine and begged a kiss.
"Where shall we go? Not back to mine," I breathed. I have never nor will I ever have a man in the bed I share with Alpha. Interesting how this one scruple appears even in my dream affairs.
"My girlfriend is at mine." I mentally pawed at him and whined - at that point I would have taken any horizontal surface. I agreed and we harangued location for a bit until he said,
"The spare room in my flat has a lock on it. We could go there and she would never know."
God knows how much I wanted him then. I remember, in my dream, feeling the heat of my pussy in my knickers and being amazed he couldn't feel it too. I agreed though spoke my reservations - I'm not a dumb fuck though obviously I was willing to be in my dream.
We tripped quietly up to his and sat in the kitchen. We were both suddenly shy in that marvelous way one gets before a shag. It's a bit like going to the doctor - you know you're going to get naked but keenness to do so should be avoided. He bustled about making gin tonics and I leaned against the kitchen table. He picked up a book he had recently received as a present and asked if we should play.
"What is it?" I replied.
"Getting To Know Your Friends: 1000 Questions Everyone Should Ask and Be Asked," he laughed. I agreed and he asked me my middle name. I told him and he told me. He asked me my place of birth. I told him and he told me. I took the book off him and told him his questions here boring. I flicked quickly through the book whilst he came and stood between my legs. I opened my thighs so we were as close as possible. I could feel the hardening ridge of his cook against my pussy and his hands run the length of my leg. I ignored him and continued to flick through the book even as my body throbbed.
"Ah!" I said, "here's one. Any scars?" Without a word he pulled up his shirt and jumper to show me a shallow appendix scar. I reached to touch it but paused just as I was about to touch him. I questioned him with my eyes and he nodded tightly, a muscle in his jaw flexing just so you wouldn't know unless you looked. I ran too fingernails the length of the scar and watched, fascinated as his surprisingly hard abs jumped at my touch. I wanted to lick the length of it and feel the hard ridge but I paused and said,
"Well?"
"Wh... What?" he asked as if coming from a place far away.
"Aren't you going to ask me?"
"Ask you what?"
"Do I have any scars silly."
"Do you?"
Without answering I unbuttoned my shirt slowly. He tried to hold my gaze but it kept slipping to my lacy covered breasts. He gulped as they came into view but I turned slightly to show him my shoulder.
"What, I can't see it."
"Use your fingers, can you feel the ridge?" He did and we both shivered this time.
"What's it from?"
"No one's quite sure. Most likely I just gave myself a good scratch on some barbed wire. Not very glam, I know. I don't remember, I was very young."
He leaned forward to kiss it but as his mouth was millimeters away we heard a light turn on and the pad of footsteps in the hall.
"Who's there darling?" A querulous female voice called as I swiftly buttoned my shirt and tried to look presentable.
"Only me," I called out. One thing I do know is Never Look Guilty: Invite the cheated wife to join in, ask them if they fancy a drink too, mention your Alpha and for gods sake look thrilled to see them.
"Sorry, darling thought you were asleep. X was out tonight and I can't stand him so I blackmailed the Teacher into drinking more with me at yours. Fancy one too?" I asked blithely, waving a bottle. She looked suspiciously between the two of us but I looked so welcoming and happy (and I did say she wasn't that bright) and the Teacher was smart enough to follow suit. After a moment she shook her head and went back to bed, extolling us to have fun. The door closed and we called at the same time,
"We will!"
Ok, that's enough, I'm tired and going to bed now... I'll finish the rest of my dream tomorrow.
Sleep tight my children...
* There's a prize for the person who doesn't need Wikipedia to locate Klatch
